Teenager Steamrolls Entertainment Industry

A month ago, the Teenager mentioned that he wanted to hold a fundraiser for his high school’s theatre department. “A rock concert,” he said. “With a name band and a big sponsor, like maybe Coca-Cola!”

Precious, I thought.

I might have worried when he told me he was invited to a meeting with the school district’s attorney, the superintendent of schools and his high school principal. But I thought the whole concept would blow over right then and there.

Who knew a 17-year-old could navigate the muddied waters of politics and regulations at a large public school district?

The concert is happening, and the Teenager's desk has turned into a flurry of e-mails and paperwork. There are budgets and contracts, and there are security guards to hire and sound systems to arrange. In between sponsorship negotiations with, yes, Coca-Cola, and a host of local businesses, radio stations and guitar shops, the Teenager debates whether to fly a name alternative rock band in from New Jersey, or hire an up-and-coming Phoenix band with a huge local following.

A momentary roadblock arose. Construction on the school’s auditorium was scheduled for completion after the concert date, which meant the lobby would be boarded up. How gauche. And where would the Teenager locate the sponsor’s booths?

The Teenager suggested to his school’s principal that the school’s construction schedule be rearranged to complete the auditorium lobby in time for the fundraiser. The principal agreed wholeheartedly. At a private tour yesterday of the half-completed lobby, the construction director explained to the Teenager how he had moved an entire crew off of the gymnasium construction onto the auditorium project so that the lobby could be completed a month ahead of schedule, just in time for the concert.

My mother holds a special place in her heart for the Teenager. For his fifth birthday (he was still called Pumpkin back then), she gave him cash and noted, "Pumpkin thinks a lot about money, and I think that's a fine thing."

I knew Mom would be pleased by Pumpkin's fundraising plans, so I called to tell her all about it. "Well, I think that's just wonderful," she said. "You know Alice Cooper has been very involved with the local schools here in the past. The Teenager should call him!"

"Omigosh, what a grand idea," I said. "And I might even be able to track down people who know his people!" Thrilled that I could make an adult contribution to the Teenager’s dreams, I called the young man right away. His reply?

“Oh, yeah, we already talked to him.”

“You…t-t-t-talked...to Alice Cooper?”

“Yeah. He’s got a charity for teenagers and he’s not going to play at the concert, but he's agreed to make an appearance.”

“Did you just say Alice Cooper agreed to make an appearance at your concert?”

“Oh, yeah. He’s pretty cool ya know.”

Yeah, kid. I know.


parenting teenagers daily life humor writing diary

TIME Magazine "Person of the Year"

Imagine: the good people at TIME Magazine have chosen me (yup, you read that right - ME!) and YOU and YOU and YOU, too, as Person of the Year.

This weird geeky world that a mere 13 million of us inhabited in 2005, is now so ubiquitous that even my parents, who are in their 70s, are hooked on YouTube (a video of John McCain imitating Barbara Streisand doubled them over in laughter, and I've not been able to stop them since!).

Congratulations to us all!!